The Recovering Worrier

As a recovering Worrier, you move out of learned helplessness and into the world. You employ the Strength compass point of your Self Compass, in rhythm with your Weakness compass point. In so doing, you relate more effectively with people, bringing a much needed virtue to those interactions: empathy for human pain.  

Virtue of Empathy

It’s not that the times of feeling lonely disappear. It’s more that when they come, you do something to alleviate them. 

• You actually get yourself to a new church group you’ve been thinking about checking out. 
• You stop yourself from disappearing the moment the Bible study is over. 
• You discipline yourself to stay at least five minutes and engage in some sort of conversation. 
• You’re good at listening and getting better at talking. 
• Even though it’s scary, you’re learning to stay with a feeling and express it, rather than avoid it.
• Now daring to express needs and wants, you do it in a humble manner, sensitive to the other person’s point of view. 

 

Worrier Self Compass

Mobilizing your Strength and Assertion compass points brings a depth dimension to the events of your day that before had seemed flat and dreary.

You develop rhythmic access to all four compass points, yet since you favor the Weakness compass point, you are in the enviable position to readily own that you don’t have all the answers, and that you need God’s help in handling everyday life.

This is how redeemed Worriers reveal their growth in actual behavior when they access the LAWS of the Self Compass. And the virtue of empathy bears fruit:

Worrier—virtue of empathy.

• Isn’t demanding or competitive.
• Sensitive rapport with others.
• Peacemaking. 
• Has a high frustration tolerance.
• Not motivated by status or material gain.
• Is especially tender toward children, animals, and those who suffer. 

With the infusion of compass virtues, the locus of the self has changed. No longer is it fragmented, imbalanced, stuck on one or more of the compass points. Instead, your personality is now grounded in a balanced, God-oriented center that holds.

Instead of predictably patterned behavior, the Self Compass now offers you 360 degrees of choice to use as appropriate for any given situation. Now you are freed to express yourself through your own individual style in Christ. Precious in his eyes, there is no one else like you, because “the very hairs of your head are all numbered” (Mt 10:30 NKJV).

For more, read:

THE SELF COMPASS: CHARTING YOUR PERSONALITY IN CHRIST

Find Peace with the Couples Finance Compass

Do you and your partner fight over finances? All too common, all too painful. The Self Compass shows you why and what to do about it:

Dependent trend spouses stuck on the Love compass point buy too many things to make too many people happy. They say, “Sure, honey” when asked about a purchase when they really mean “No, it’s too expensive for us right now.” They want their partner’s approval, and can’t stand the prospect of their anger. Yet they feel secret resentment toward their spouse.

Aggressive trend spouses stuck on the Assertion compass point buy what they want when they want it without much consideration of their partner’s perspective.  They are suspicious about their spouse’s spending habits, yet will lie about how much they’ve actually spent themselves.

But when each spouse balances Love with Assertion, they learn to diplomatically stand up for their financial preferences and to be generous and trusting of their partner’s. This takes a willingness to be honest yet tactful, compromising yet realistic.

Couples Finance Compass

Withdrawn trend spouses stuck on the Weakness compass point avoid taking financial responsibility. They see themselves as incapable of learning how to handle finances and feel defeatist and apologetic when their spouse gets exasperated with them. Which is often.

Controlling trend spouses stuck on the Strength compass point like to take over family finances; they know it all and judge their spouse as less competent than they. Their down-putting remarks about spending habits results in their spouse feeling financially inept, thereby confirming their incompetence. 

When Weakness and Strength are combined in couple’s financial issues, each spouse balances fair-minded responsibility with discerning compromise to reach ongoing workable principles. This takes a willingness for both partners to admit they don't know everything about finances, that they can make mistakes, as well as a willingness to ask for outside help, learn how to balance a budget, and exercise discipline in keeping it. 

Couples Finances

Love with Assertion brings freedom to discuss individual financial priorities honestly, yet with a generous heart. Weakness combined with Strength promotes financial competence without being judgmental about mistakes. Couples end up with a practical budget and room to enjoy life, while revisiting spending decisions as family circumstances change.

For more on how to transform these personality trends, read:

The Self Compass: 

Charting Your Personality in Christ